i hate my life right now

i hate this city. well, i hate this city with snow.

i just can't handle it. i'm very close to just saying "fuck it"...i actually looked up plane tickets home today or tomorrow 'cause i just need to get out of this fucking cold chaotic place.

fuck grad school that i'm paying out of the ass for which will most likely do me no good. i can't even write one poem a week anymore. i'm so over writing papers. i've been doing it for nearly 5 years now. when does it end? why did i go for writing anyway? what a fucked up idea that was.

now i have to drive home friday for a fund raiser my dad is hosting for me to send me to prague in july. he'll probably make around $1,000, which will still leave me $4,000 in the hole. how am i going to pay for it? why am i letting my awesome parents do this for me if it probably won't even happen?

my sister doesn't even call me to update me anymore on how she is. i'm no longer the first person she tells things because i up and moved away. i seldom talk to my best friend anymore. and to top everything off...it's fucking valentines' day! even though i'm pretty content with the pseudo-relationship i'm in, this stupid fucking consumer driven holiday still pisses me off.

how did i get here?

i couldn't live without books

tonight: 1st oyez review release reading for issue 34, 5 P.M @ downtown roosevelt campus

i'll be reading a few fiction snipets.

love this:

"What do these children do without storybooks?" Naftali asked.
And Reb Zebulun replied: "They have to make do. Storybooks aren't bread. You can live without them."
"I couldn't live without them," Naftali said.
-- Isaac Bashevis Singer, Naftali the Storyteller and His Horse, Sus

almost monday :(

it's sunday night already. boo.
but i did have a nice weekend. -->

yesterday, alisha and i went downtown to old navy and h&m. got a few new shirts and a huge red knitted scarf and hat that i'm in love with. nick and i were supposed to go see the shins, but instead we ordered pizza, got high, and played hooplah. then i got to see his new place, which is nice and will probably be pretty sweet once he has running water back.

went to target this afternoon with alisha and we covered the entire store. i think i'm done with my spending spree now. only spent about $150 over the last two days, which isn't even 1/2 of my tax refund, so i think i did well. got a new king size down pillow that is yummy and a few other things that i needed. i'm usually not really a consumer whore, but damn i love target.

after the target run i did some homework and then nick showed up to use the shower and we ate pudding and played hooplah again with alisha.

overall, an enjoyable weekend.

boo winter

it's too. freaking. cold outside. i can't handle it. fuck painful winds, i'm sitting home on my lazy ass with a blanket and some tea and i don't care what you all say about it. so there.

grey's anatomy pissed me off something awful last night. that's all i'll say about it, since elaborating more would make it look like i may care a bit too much about a television show. which i don't. motherfuckingshitass!

i got a bill today from a company i don't even recognize. i love being an adult.
i also love when it's so cold out that your boogers freeze and then you rub your nose and they scratch something up there and it bleeds. yeah. that happened today.

the above rambling was a bit of a bummer. but it's ok because it's friday and i don't work weekends anymore!

yay

my girlfriend crissy is getting married in may and i get to be in her wedding. it just makes me smile whenever i think about it. she's going to make such a beautiful bride.

and...she's going to have little korean babies! AHHH!

blah

they've finally found something that might help my p.c.o.s. and type 2 diabetes. i get to give myself shots in my tummy every day. woot!

but...it might make it at least possible for me to lose weight. so bring on the syringes.