a lot of waiting

interviewed with roosevelt's history, art history, & philosphy department today. i'd get my own desk and paper shredder. you don't get sweller than that. the director seemed to like me a lot, so i'm hoping she'll get back to me soon. my second interview is tomorrow at 9:30am with the counseling department. i'm applying to be a peer advocate. i'll only be able to work 17hours in the work study program, but it'll be something to hold me over until i can find another part-time job.

i was just on the blue line for what seemed like hours. we stopped at the 2 stops before division and sat there for nearly 30mins each time while orange vested cta workers kept sprinting back and forth along the cars. the intercom kept shouting for passengers to stay on the train. it wouldn't have been so bad if the thing wasn't packed to the breaking point. there was this smarmy old man with stinky breath leaning over me and i kept catching him staring down my shirt in the reflection in the window. the young guy sitting next to me was clutching his laptop for dear life and kept scooting over each time he relaxed his leg and our thighs touched. i felt like i had cooties.

it's looking like i'm going to get an imac on saturday and this makes me very happy.

chicago

had a productive day today. opened a bank account and went grocery shopping. carrying groceries home on foot isn't fun. went to roosevelt and got my ruID and my Upass. the pictures for both are awful. one looks nothing like me because they had me take my glasses off and the other is in mid-smile so i look like a stroke victim. oh well.

orientation was great. it made me feel very confident about my choice. met janet wondra, my advisor and instructor for 2 of my classes this fall. i liked her immediately. talked to financial aid and found out i don't qualify for work study, but the super sweet little asian lady who helped me said she'd squeeze me in since i was so near the cut off. so that opens up a few more jobs for me which i'm going to apply for tomorrow.

so now i just have to straighten out my computer ordeal and find work so i'm not sitting on my ass all the time.

moving day

today is the day. my car is almost packed and i'm leaving this evening. staying the night in grand rapids with charles to cut the trip in half. then i'll be leaving in the morning tomorrow for chicago. orientation is wednesday and then i'll be job searching until classes start on the 6^th. i'm ordering a new desktop computer and printer, which will hopefully be delivered around the time school starts.

the party last night was fun. we had about 12-15 people over at one point. i'm so happy everyone came and i got to see them all before i left. a cop showed up around midnight, but anna and joey just had to get their cars out of the street. i guess he was a real ass, but didn't ask too many questions. it would have been bad if he came up to the house. saying goodbye to anna this morning was the hardest part. i'm having dinner with my mom and ash tonight and then heading out.

my tummy freaks out when i get stressed and nervous, but i'm excited and ready to just get settled and start school. and that's about it. goodbye michigan, hello illinois.

quickie

last couple of days have been fun. monday i spent with my anna, went shopping and out to eat. went to the ghetto mall on dort hwy. then we decided to make a night of it and elise came over. for the first hour we tried to get my new lip ring in with plyers. it was bad and unsuccessful. we played apples to apples for hours, drank wine, watched movies, and made cheesecake. brandon came home from work and we all stayed up until around 5a.m. yesterday i had a mum day. went shopping for a friend of hers and ate at famous daves in davison. bought a smaller lip ring and had them put it in. took 5 minutes. this morning i went out for breakfast with ash and joey. i need to start packing, but first i think i'm going to read for a bit. looking forward to sunday and seeing everyone.

lalala

ministers who come to your door are a bit scary. i was entirely unpresentable, but i didn't want to be rude. he asked me if i knew the meek shall inherit the earth and i didn't understand where he was going. i'm assuming he was a jehovas witness. i'm not a great christian, but i know i love the Lord and the Lord loves me. i'm sorry, but i'm really not interested in your materials.

doing something with elise and anna today. i'd like to get my oil changed, hair cut, and pick up a new lip ring, but i'm broke. i also have no gas. not sure how i'm going to wing this. i don't like money.

mmmm...paul bettany.

that's it

life fucks you sometimes. but when it keeps fucking you over and over again, you have to start thinking...i'm doing something wrong here. no one digs themselves deep enough to be buried alive. you can always climb out.

depression isn't a lifestyle. get over it. fuck!

drunken reunion

last night was a mini-dryden reunion at coyote joe's + anna, which made it extra wonderful. amy was hammered and hilarious. ash showed up after she got off work to pick us up and amy just dragged her over to the stamp lady and she stamped her hand without even looking at her. she didn't drink, of course, since she was still our DD. we had a sisterly bull ride together. i was wearing a skirt again and ash landed on it when we fell off and i flashed everyone my red skibbies. we all tried to learn a few line dances while they were in progress. i kept going the wrong direction and bumping into kristen who just laughed her ass off at me. bores and meg were there too. and lindsay for a bit, but i never knew her very well. i was able to have a drunken reconciliation with meagan, which i feel good about. alcohol can be productive sometimes.

anna just left. we both felt a little sick at the fact that i only have a week or so left in michigan. i'm trying to not think about it and just enjoy each day as it comes. i know i'm going to be a wreck the first week or so, missing my girls, but i'll have my new roommates. i get the feeling that alicia will be good company during the transition.

ridiculous

reason #472 why i'm very much a girl...

i slid a raft off the deck of the pool to sunbath on and flipped it over to clean it off. i looked down, without my glasses on, and saw a little green thing by my leg. it kind of looked like it was swimming. seconds before i realized it was a frog, chaos broke out. i grabbed for the skimmer and flung the thing about 6 feet in the air while screaming hysterically. heather heard me over the lawnmower next door. it took me another minute after scrambling up the ladder to do the gross out dance before i calmed down.

poor little frog.

come swim with me

...it's beautiful out today.

welcome to my life / part 2

it's amazing how someone can give you a smile that seems like it might explode right off your face and then make you feel like curling up in a ball and sleeping for a day, all within a 24 hour period.





well, fuck that.

welcome to my life

rode almost all the rides last night at the fair except that one that spins around really fast while you stand up and are held in by nothing but a thin chain and gravity. it's not that i don't trust gravity. i don't trust that the machine won't breakdown while i'm up on top and i'll be stuck dangling by only a thin piece of linked metal.

we rode what i think was called the fire ball, which is this rollercoaster type thing where you sit harnessed in (i usually trust a harness) and go upside down. ash had this wonderful idea of sitting across from me and so we were dangling upside down laughing hysterically at each other with this kid next to her who probably thought we were crazy. we rode the pirate ship thing first and i didn't do too well on it. i had my eyes closed the whole time and i'm sure the little kids across from me thought i was pretty funny. ran into tara by the bump & run cars (which i don't get). reagan has gotten so big and she's just gorgeous. tara moved to a place on hosner and she's currently not working, so i'm planning on getting over there and visiting before i leave and meeting her fiance. it's a bit crazy to think we've been friends for 16 years.

we're dog watching cuddles for my grandma and the little rat whines ALL THE TIME. it's driving me nuts, but she's so old and shakes constantly so it's impossible not to take pity on her. she'll curl up in a ball on my stomach while i'm reading and will calm down. i think i gave her too big of a doggie treat earlier and she nearly choked on it. a future situation of having to tell my grandmother that i played a part in the death of her antique dog made me panic for a second, but she eventually got it down. she follows me everywhere. i want to slip her a zanax, but i don't think that'd fly.

today seems like it could go both ways: either plummet horribly or pleasantly float away. nice to meet you, welcome to my life.

elvis + a mummy = bad idea

i went to grand rapids yesterday. hung out with an old friend, charles, and got re-aquainted. now i'm a bit sad i don't get to spend more time with him before i move. he's pretty much the cat's pajamas. i lent him some books, so he let me take his dane cook cd for the ride back to dryden. i was the crazy girl laughing her ass off alone in her car all the way home. it was great.

going out to eat with my mum and then to the fair tonight with ashley. i promised her i'd ride all the rides. not sure what i got myself into. i vaguely remember becoming ill the last time i rode the zipper.

couldn't do it

after seeing this picture, i combed my dreads out. i missed my pretty hair too much. they felt all gross and my hair has always been very silky. i just couldn't do it. so after 2 hours of combing and an entire bottle of conditioner, my normal head of hair is back.

knatty

so the dreads are done. they are messy still and gross feeling, but in a couple of weeks they should start maturing nicely. ash dropped me off at the bookstore earlier and i passed out in the checkout line. a lady called 911, but i didn't have to go in the ambulance. we're not sure why it happened, but i think it might be a bad reaction to the meds i'm on for my infection. scared the shit out of me. i came home and knitted myself a sweet headband [see above].

still owweey

people who get all philosophical and shit about body piercing and go on and on about how wonderful the feeling of metal is as it enters your skin are fucking NUTS! i'm swollen and pussy and my mouth is confused so it's overproducing saliva which is giving me a 24/7 stomach ache.

i'm down with the whole post-heal piercing experience. i developed an unexplainable adoration for my old tongue piercing. but right now, this whole world of body modification is sucking something awful.

re-coop day

i'm making myself mac 'n cheese because yesterday i got spikes stuck through both my tongue and lip and today i was diagnosed with bladder, urinary tract, and kidney infections. i've probably had the bladder infection for multiple months now and that's what has been causing my back pain. i'm a walking owwey. the doctor gave me a pill that turned my pee bright orange.

rascist christians make me want to drop kick someone.

owwweyyy

got my tongue re-pierced and my lip done today. i know i'll be happy about it once they heal, but right now i feel like i bit through my tongue and someone punched me in the mouth. he couldn't stretch the hole, so he had to pierce it through the scar tissue. i don't recommend doing this, just keep the bitch in if you aren't sure. it hurt as much as the first time, but x9087234098432, and it went slower because it kept catching on clumps of scar. ash said i made a really horrible face. now my lip and my tongue are swollen, so i sound ridiculous. if anyone needs cheering up, they should call me for a good laugh.

everyone who knows me well knows that i'm really phobic about looking manly/butch. this is probably due to being plump and having pcos. because of this i get carried away with plucking my eyebrows. i went a little overboard last time and i kind of look surprised all the time now. amy, who has her degree in skin care, told me that i should grow them out and that she'd shape them before i move so they look natural. so now that's what i'm doing. if you see me within the next couple weeks i should look pretty beastly: bushy eyebrows and a swollen lip + tongue.

august

well it's finally august...the month i leave michigan behind and start over. kind of starting to get a little nervous, but excited too.

i have another chiro appt. today and i have to get to lapeer to return movies. i'm horrible at that. i need netflix. i rented 8 below and watched it twice. i can't wait until i can have my own pet-friendly place so i can get a husky. they are the most beautiful animals. i've wanted one since i was little. i also wish i could go to antartica or even just vancouver. it looks so beautiful there. i'm not sure if i could endure the cold though. i'm fragile.

finally got to see brendan, though it took some coaxing. i'd missed him. he makes me laugh. spent the night at his place in grand rapids with ash and joey. his roommate is more pompous than he is, which i didn't know was possible. i know i'm a hippie and i like the way i dress. it's just an irritant for someone to constantly be critiquing me. especially someone who obviously has no creativity and conforms to social norms.

i've realized that i avoid confrontation like the plague. i stand up for myself occasionally, but mostly i just ignore it. it'd be worse if i sat around feeling bad about it, but i usually know i'm the better person and just let it go. or i apologize for something that i don't really feel sorry for because i just want the problem to be over with and move on. i see no point in fighting or arguing. this method has always seemed like the mature route to me. now i'm starting to think that i'm degrading myself by letting people walk all over me. i also think that all the anger that builds up, even if it's subconsiously, may mount to the breaking point, which isn't healthy. i got so angry with my parents the other night that i just freaked out. screamed so loud that my voice cracked and everyone just sat there staring at me. i was right though and they got the point, but i think if i had said something earlier than i wouldn't have had to spaz the way i did.

i hate humidity. weather.com says it's 91, but feels like 101. ew. i'm heading to rochester this evening to spend some time with amy and bores. i haven't seen either of them in too long and it should be fun. amy's cooking dinner, we'll drink wine, and possibly hit the pool. i'm looking forward to it.