august

well it's finally august...the month i leave michigan behind and start over. kind of starting to get a little nervous, but excited too.

i have another chiro appt. today and i have to get to lapeer to return movies. i'm horrible at that. i need netflix. i rented 8 below and watched it twice. i can't wait until i can have my own pet-friendly place so i can get a husky. they are the most beautiful animals. i've wanted one since i was little. i also wish i could go to antartica or even just vancouver. it looks so beautiful there. i'm not sure if i could endure the cold though. i'm fragile.

finally got to see brendan, though it took some coaxing. i'd missed him. he makes me laugh. spent the night at his place in grand rapids with ash and joey. his roommate is more pompous than he is, which i didn't know was possible. i know i'm a hippie and i like the way i dress. it's just an irritant for someone to constantly be critiquing me. especially someone who obviously has no creativity and conforms to social norms.

i've realized that i avoid confrontation like the plague. i stand up for myself occasionally, but mostly i just ignore it. it'd be worse if i sat around feeling bad about it, but i usually know i'm the better person and just let it go. or i apologize for something that i don't really feel sorry for because i just want the problem to be over with and move on. i see no point in fighting or arguing. this method has always seemed like the mature route to me. now i'm starting to think that i'm degrading myself by letting people walk all over me. i also think that all the anger that builds up, even if it's subconsiously, may mount to the breaking point, which isn't healthy. i got so angry with my parents the other night that i just freaked out. screamed so loud that my voice cracked and everyone just sat there staring at me. i was right though and they got the point, but i think if i had said something earlier than i wouldn't have had to spaz the way i did.

i hate humidity. weather.com says it's 91, but feels like 101. ew. i'm heading to rochester this evening to spend some time with amy and bores. i haven't seen either of them in too long and it should be fun. amy's cooking dinner, we'll drink wine, and possibly hit the pool. i'm looking forward to it.